On Being Grateful

"Leading is a very lonely journey," said a friend of mine.

As she said it, tears streamed down her gorgeous face, leaving me with unbearable sadness of knowing that I could not go back to that moment. 

"But having encountered you guys, I know that at least I am not the only one who strive to lead for the betterment.."

And it was, indeed, correct. For all I know, my participation in 2nd Youth Leadership Workshop on Global Citizenship Education brought insights to my ordinary life journey. For having known that across the archipelago, there is a girl who got to quit from her master degree for exposing her corrupt professor. There's a girl who strive to prove the value of gender equality. There is a man who succeeded increase a number of female participation in the national parliament. There is a girl who fight for mental health. And others who fight for anti-terrorism movement. And lots of other outstanding achievement. 

This time, I don't feel ashamed for myself, after having encountered many outstanding people. This time, I feel empowered. For knowing that my sacrifices will eventually worth it. For knowing that being idealist is so underrated that's why we have to keep pursuing the goals. For realizing that I am not alone. Some times when I am all alone and surrounded by a solitude, it's like having a chest pain, of feeling very desperate for wanting to go back, and hopeless for knowing that I do not have any idea when can I meet them again. 

These people give me hopes.

That there are still people who could not care any less about my physical qualities, or other inherent identity which stick with me everywhere I go. They accept me regardless my religion, skin color, or even citizenship. All that we know is we are so damn curious as to how we view the world and pursue our goals to make the world a literally better place. Back to my hometown, I realized that challenges which emerged, do not happen because of the personality of the people, but the unfortunate surroundings which we live in. And we are just too accustomed with that, to the point we  got blind of the world that is beyond us.

I am taken aback to the unfortunate happenings when I overheard people who called me heartless for trying to be professional. For people who labelled me zero experience in the field I am working as. For people who talked behind my back saying that all I can do is becoming the Head Office's puppy. For people who blamed me for being honest. And for people who doubt me for the job I am trusted as. I used to feel desperate, knowing that I am not favoured by my surroundings. But today, instead of feeling down, I feel empowered by all the sayings I happen to know. That out there, people are paying attention to what I do and they care so much for my personal development in enhancing my leadership skills. And that makes me feel empowered.

Though the word empower is overrated, I feel that now I experience it by myself, it poses a very strong force in driving someone to be more determined in achieving his/her goals. And that is beyond marvelous. Each and everyone of us are a leader, at least in choosing the right path for ourselves, which gives a good impact to our surroundings, and in return indirectly give us the power to contribute to the betterment.Because each of us are a leader, for being able to overcome difficulties and our lowest point in life, for being able to take a full responsibility of ourselves. And each of us are a leader, in a way that we stem a hope, one day we'll become significant to somebody else's live.

And no, I am not going to shed a tear for being called a heartless person, because though all individuals are entitled for their own opinion, the words we utter better undergo a complete process of verification.